You Have To Step In Their Shoes

When I find Mr. Right, I'm not going to be able to remember the boy who broke up with me over the phone in 28 seconds. - Taylor Swift as of 2 days ago.

So I still notice that Taylor Swift hasn't gotten over Joseph. I know it was about a year ago, and obviously she felt something deep for him, as he did for her at the time. I mean he did say 'Forever and Always' according to her music. And promising someone Forever and Always is a big promise to someone. They were together for about a month I believe, and I loved them together not going to lie. Taylor is so sweet, beautiful, and talented. And so is Joe. They were great for each other, but not meant to be together forever. It's understandable Taylor has had boyfriends before, but what she felt for Joe was something different. She was fascinated by him and how he loved her for the time. But what disgusts me is the hate Taylor still gets and how everyone keeps wanting to scream 'GET.THE.HECK.OVER.IT' but they just do not understand how rough it is.

I mean really really think about it. Stop what you're doing. Turn off the music you're blasting, turn off the TV, and keep reading and clear all of your thoughts out of your head. Imagine. You're dating the sweetest, caring, funny, charming, drop dead gorgeous boy you have ever met. He makes you laugh like nobody else can, he makes you feel like you're the most precious gift in the entire world. He knows you are a treasure. And he treats you like a fragile diamond. He cares for you. Then one day you two are talking and he decides that he loves you. You ask him 'Do you love me?' and he says to you 'I could never look at another girl the same way I see you. You are the most beautiful person I have ever laid eyes on. Someone like you is impossible to find. I vow to take care of you, be there forever, Forever and Always' You're overwhelmed. You're so in love you can't feel the ground you're walking on, you feel like you are flying to heaven and you'll never come down. But then one day out of nowhere your Angel wings are ripped right out of your back. He decides to tell you it's not working out, he 'just wants to be your friend' but when really he found someone who he THINKS is better. He breaks your heart, tears it right out of your chest and stomps on it with his 2 left feet. This boy who you were sure was the Prince you were going to spend your life with just swept a peasant girl off of her feet and she is going to live your place in his Castle. You're stuck in the cold, standing in the rain, so wet nobody can see you cry. You pray for answers, they never come though. You can't find the thoughts to get over him. It's going to be stuck with you for the rest of your life... and you're going to dread it. Even when your Prince finds you, he's still in the back of your mind. And you are in his.

It's times like these when you have to open up your ears and listen to your heart. What's confusing to understand is that your head longs for him back. Not your heart. Your heart knows what's right and wrong, and it's ready to be healed by your Prince. But you have to listen to your heart. It's hard to not talk about him, especially when your family gets mad at you for it. I am sick of people hating Taylor for something they don't even understand. You have to know how hard it is before you judge. I have been there and it is the most heart breaking experience ever. To loose someone so fast, and ending it like that. Never finding the truth, never becoming friends, Things are broken apart and shattered glass. And they can't be put back together. But if you truly want it fixed, you have to do it yourself. 

Taylor, Joe is an amazing guy as you know. But he was wrong. He left you for a girl who used him. I hate to say it, but total Karma. Just like me, you need to get over him. It's hard, and we all hate it. But your Prince is coming. Wait for him, Juliet. 

Love is on its way.

Mind Over Matter.

Hello, Bloggers. This is just a story that was taken from a dream I had last night, it was one of the most painful things I ever had to witness. It was heart shattering and depressing, and I pray it never happens. It's not real, but it really is my mind over my heart.

It was long ago, not that long actually... the rush of adrenaline that runs through my veins when I think about it is fascinating. He was my very first kiss, my first boyfriend, the very first boy to call me beautiful while looking in my eyes, as if he was looking through my soul. His brown hair, and those hypnotizing green eyes. The boy is gorgeous, he's tall, adorable, and knows how to make me laugh. Up until now, I've gotten over everything we've had. I was nothing but something to use to him, but I do know I can move on to bigger and better things. 

Of course, I still have to see him everyday. Do I want him back? That's a hard question. My head longs for him. My brain and thoughts want him to come back and feel his lips against mine, his hands wrapped around my body in an neverending embrace. For him to care for me once again. But My heart? No. Absolutely not. I had always taught myself to listen to my heart, and it's become easier once you figure things out. My heart longs for another, and I know who he is, and I want to be with him more than anything. He is everything I've pictured in my husband. The ex, Him on the other hand, he was great, but was with me for the wrong reason. I never thought he would enter my head again... But I went to bed that one night, I would have never expected a dream about him... and others, and yes that is what happened once I closed my eyes. 

I hardly remember what it started out as. It must have been a trip for the entire class, or I met up with him out of nowhere when I went on vacation. He had looked at me like he used to, into my eyes through my soul. I must have said something to him before hand, and I don't remember. I said his name softly. We had been standing in the open, it started to rain. The sky was a dull shade of grey, absolutely no color on his face or in his eyes. He looked dead with no life in his eyes. I felt so weak, as if I was about to fall over. If I had said something to him, it had affected us both. Because I'm sure I was the mirror reflection of him right then. Life had disappeared from both of our faces. He looked at me, bags under his eyes with dark circles. His skin pale. He started walking closer to me, which turned into running, eventually he had me in his embrace. It felt weird to be in his arms again. While he was embracing me, I was standing there in his arms, at my weakest point trying to get him to honestly let go. This felt like a dream in a dream. Pinch me, please... I was almost to the point of hypervenalaying. 

The rain started to fall, everything felt black and white. The trees were completely bare, winter was definitely here. I had just stood there, in his arms. He would not let me leave, it's as if holding onto me was his only way to breathe. I was his oxygen for this moment. He had his face in my hair and he was trying to say something through his choking voice.

"I'm so sorry... I spent the last year in pain, missing you. I let the most precious thing I ever met in my life go so easily. You are an angel, I have never met someone so happy, so full of life and smiles ever... I would give everything to have you be mine again."

I never was yours. I thought to myself. I kept saying 'let go' to him trying not to cry. I felt like I was going to collapse. My mind was over matter, It craved his kisses. But my heart was being ripped apart at this moment. Where was my Knight. He had been kissing my hair at the same time, begging for forgiveness. I had already forgiven him. But I cannot have him. I have to guard my heart, and it already is being protected by someone else. I do love you, I do. But it took you this long to realize you made a huge mistake of letting me slip from you. 

I just can't have you... I'm not that girl for you.

Yet you mean a lot to me.

You always will. 

But my 'love' for you is nothing but infatuation, and for that I am sorry.

Fatigued, Puffy Eyes, It must be a Stampede.

Dear God,

So today has been FULL of Drama. I've had my dream crushed by my own mother, I was stood up by a trio of friends, and I had to say goodbye to my sister until my grades are perfectly straight A's.

First I woke up to find my parents gone, I had no idea where they were until my mom called and told me they were in Auburn for some stuff to pick up. Okay cool I had the house to myself for a few hours. Then I logged into my Facebook to check up on normal stuff, turns out my Best Friend went thrift shopping for a show we're in with my other best friend and didn't think to take me with them. Was it just another 'spur of the moment' sure. I'll buy it. I'm acting like a total jerk when I type this, mainly because I am the co-director of the show. I would like to hope I'm included in everything INVOLVING her show. Awesome they picked up everything. I'm just mad as a bull stuck in a house full of Red. I'm not mad at anybody, but just the fact she couldn't call and ask. What is this? 

Second, I had to run to town to pick up some stuff with my mom. I drove to practice for my exam in a few weeks. I fail at parking. I told my mom last night about some casting directors that are about 30 minutes away where I can send my resume and headshots we can take. She snapped at me and yelled at me saying I already told her. Eventually, the big question came from me:

"Do you Even Want This For Me?" I cracked when I said it. Eyes started to water. Her response:

"I Don't Actually. I never did."

That was a stab to the heart. I feel so empty right now... broken... shattered... completely stepped on. That ruined the rest of my Day. I now feel as if I'm walking on air. I'm not awake, I feel like my entire being went completely idle... and now I'm just walking in a dream. Pinch Me. Wake me up.. anything that will snap me out of this right now. What doesn't help is 2 of my best friends who were together split apart... I don't know how they're doing, God help us.

Lastly, what I come home to. I talked to my friend, My sister Megan about my day. She's rather irked about it. She was talking to her Dad about how they can help me with stuff and accomplishing what I want to do. And what college I want to go to. I want to go to colleges that require good education, which is what I have, but it's just hard to balance it out with people constantly on my case about everything in my life. I already feel like I'm being stalked out by the paparazzi. Her Dad said something along lines of that I need to get my butt off the computer, away from the TV and work harder at my studies. You don't think I do? Well I'm sorry for trying my hardest. I WANT those grades. I WANT to go to a good college. And then she tells me her Dad never lets her talk to people with average grades, people who've been to summer school [because their teacher failed 30/32 people], people like me... and I had to tell her goodbye. I don't know what she'll say once she's sees the message, it wasn't intended to hurt her. But I can't let her talk to me if I don't help her grades. 

I may be smart, I may be inspiring so I've been told, but I'm not a role model. My grades SUCK. I'm not a girl someone Megans age should be looking up to...

I just want her to succeed... with my grades now, I'm not going to be a singer... I'm going to be a hobo living in a taxi is what I see.

I just don't know what to do anymore...

God Help Me. 

Amen...

Just Give It A Try, How Do You Know What'll Happen? You Can't See The Future.

Currently: Listening to "Solo" by Demi Lovato [AMAZING!]

Before: Passed on a inspiring message/video

So, As it says, before this I watched a really inspiring video with an amazing message. But I need to say something before I post it. 

Many times nowadays, it doesn't have to be someone I know, but so many girls I see that [are younger!!!] or older than me or even MY age, unmarried, not even out of school, have had sex. And even those who have graduated both school and college, but couldn't find their place in this world, they take what God made them and turn it into something disastrous, vile, torn apart. 

I see many women are prostitutes and strippers now, but not only to make a living, to just entertain. It's great you want to 'flaunt what you've got' but is this really what you were made to do? I can't tell anyone to what and what not to do, but I just don't think anyone belongs in that position. I send this message to mosly teenage girls my age, as well as women older than me, adults, married, unmarried, ect. 

Many people I know don't believe in God, they don't follow him, they never [or even want to] experience his love. It leaves me thinking really, how can you say something isn't real when you never even bothered to just stop for a minute and listen? If I try to share my faith with those against God, or Satanic, and I want them to come with me to Church to just share my faith and I want them to go home and think. They don't have to change, but I just want them to stop for a moment, but whenever I try they always say stuff like "PROVE God isn't real. You are an IDIOT for believing in such a mythical being." I just walk away and forget it. I pray for them, I just wish they knew what they were missing out on.

But if you, reading this blog, little do you know, and me too, that you aren't missing out. God is always with you, he loves you, protects you. Life goes on, you may shun him out of you life but he still loves you. I'm not asking you to be a Christian after this, or to go to a church. You have your own beliefs, can I please just share my story with you? I just want to teach others about Gods love and how he works in many ways. The hardest times can be the best blessings in disguise, you just have to dig through the rough to find the diamonds. 

Being a teenager, like myself, it is the hardest time in my life so far. So many complications have come my way, when I thought I'd never make it out alive, I thought I would never be happy ever again. I thought I was just going to wake up the next day and just die alone and depressed. That time lasted from 5 months, to a year. I would pray, and ask God for advice, to make all of this and the people causing it to just go away. Did they leave? They didn't. I considered suicide at one point. I thought God wasn't just listening or hearing me.

But I was wrong. 

Everything bad that happened and when everything felt worse and I felt like I was the victim in everything going on, it was all a learning experience. I put my faith in God, and I let him hold me, and I had to work through it on my own, but my Guardian Angel, Jesus Christ was always right behind me. Evidently, everything cleared up. I do go Solo most of the time, but I know I'm not alone. And I know I'm not when I look at him, as well as 3 other people in my life.

What I'm trying to say is, that when you feel alone and when you feel like you can't go to anyone or anything, if you are against God, if you Satanist, if you are against all religions, if you try to prove me wrong, you can go ahead and keep your beliefs. But I am going to say that God always sends his blessing. He always has his hand in yours. He works through his son, Jesus. He loves you! 

I say this to all my sisters, You are much higher than you sometimes think you are. You are not meant to use yourself and body for horrible things. I believe in marriage before sex, so you are forever stuck with your 'one' and it's not made for us to give our virginity to some stranger at the ages of 17 or 18. Your virginity is the most precious gift God has given you since your were born. I believe every girl has one special Man made for them, you may not know who it is when you see him, but feelings grow, and maybe we're destined to meet the wrong people before we meet the right person. He's out there, he's looking for his Princess. Even if you do give it to a man who changes his mind, God still loves you and he will for Eternity. 

He does Love you

He always Protects you

And He wants to protect you.

HE WANTS TO PROTECT YOU, BEAUTIFUL SISTER! 

You're all so incredibly talented in your own ways. You are the most precious Gift God has given your parents even if sometimes they get mad at you. Be it singing, acting, dancing, painting, writing, sports, ANYTHING. It can even be an academic class, you are all SO beautiful and amazing and even those I don't know I love you! And all I want in my life is to be heard. I focus all my hard work into my Music and my Acting, and it's gotten me farther than I thought it ever would.

I hate how most people see every Christians as Hypocritical, Ignorant, Judging people. Who are we to judge? We don't decide who goes to Heaven or Hell. Not all of us are like that. It depends on the person, and what they see in others. I listen to everyone, and I respect what they believe in. I see beauty and light in every heart that I pass.

Try to prove me wrong, say whatever you believe, I don't care if you don't believe in God, I know Religion and beliefs are whatever makes you happy. Did I ever say I was trying to change your mind? Absolutely not. Hate Me. But This is me. This is my heart speaking, Listen to it for at least 3 seconds. Because I made a commitment years ago that nobody or anything would stop me from trying to share and accomplish what I want to do in my life... to sing. To do what I love to do. And I encourage you everyday, go for it. Let nobody, let nothing, slow you down either. God is always there to catch you even if you trip but manage to get back up on your own. I can't predict your future for you, it's all an adventure and you hold the map. Find your way, and even if you don't know me, I'm there beside you the whole way up :)

Love, Sissy Jordy 

<3

P.S.

Try listening to the song "Hallelujah" by Rufus Wainwright, it's a beautiful one and you'll love it.

For the Lord has plans for you... to prosper and not harm you. 

(Jeremiah 29:19)

My Favorite Brothers.

Title pretty much states everything. I have had so much inspiration lately, for songs... and even a one chapter story. But I can't put them into words. I want to write that story more than anything right now, but it would take hours... maybe 2 hours if I got it solid, but I have school tomorrow but I doubt I'm going because I'm feeling sick. Anyway that's not important.

I have never had a head full of ideas and imagination before in my life. I could write 50 songs before breakfast if they would just sort out!! The reason I can't write the 50 songs is because They're all scrambled up in my head and I can't figure out what lyrics would go where:

The sun is radiantly shining in the deep blue sea

Down low, way down low in the deep blue in the sky.

Yes. There is a song referring to a morning and the ocean. In answer to the before breakfast remark: Scrambled ideas instead of Scrambled Eggs for breakfast.

My inspiration lately has been the entire Jonas family. The band, the friends, and especially the family of 6. I found a few songs on youtube of Mr. and Mrs. Jonas singing worship songs for their church and [call me weird] but I feel as if I heard the exact same versions before... when I was little. But I don't think that they were famous, that's the issue. But I do know I have heard them before.

Here's a link to one of the songs. It's beautiful!

I know I sound like a nut, but I think even without knowing them the 17 years I've been breathing, they are the reason I kept pushing myself to go forward. When I was down, I didn't only feel God tell me that everything was going to be just fine, but I felt something else. My heart? Family? Friends? Dreams? I don't know. I felt as if God has been trying to tell me something about that family all these years, and I'm not sure but I think I figured it out.

I truly do feel as if I know them. I never met them, but I feel like I've known them my whole life. I feel like an alternate Mandy Van Duyne. I feel like I was there every sunday for church, I feel like I would go over for Thanksgiving, I feel like I'm a friend at home supporting their busy career. Why do I suddenly feel like this? It scares me because half of me says it's my imagination getting the best of my heart, and the other half is trying to wake me up. Pinch me, I must be dreaming. If it is real then God Bless. My mom is just like Denise Jonas in ways. They love to cook, they're Italian, they both share a middle name, and they have the same features. Only Mrs. Jonas is much more understanding. That's the only thing as far as in common goes.

There have been so many signs that my friend and I have pointed out in the past year, it would take hours to try to remember and type them all down. So I'm sorry there.

The hardest thing for me isn't a math test. It's not trying to manage in school while living on 30 minutes of sleep. It's not watching someone I care about deeply suffer... It's finding the correct words to thank that family. They have been with me through all these years and they don't even know my name. Only Nick, Joe, and Kevin know my face. I seriously owe them everything, I don't even know where to begin. It's hard to imagine what they would say when I try to tell them Thank you... but even that isn't enough. The brothers, as well as the band and family have stuck by me all these years. They sang to me when I needed a song that I forgot the words to, they dried my tears, Along with God they held me when I needed a hug. I truly love that family more than my own. When the time comes that we meet face to face, name to name, I can't imagine what will happen. Will I be different to them? Or will I be just another pretty face to blend in with the beautiful fans? Either way, I know in my heart that Nick, Joe, and Kevin, and even little Frankie have been my best friends for years. They always have been, and they always will be my Favorite Brothers.

New Song - Rainy Drive

I wrote yet another song! I'm proud of this one... :) This one can go for any situation for feeling unwanted. It's similar to the Meteor Shower one, but this is focused on mainly one person. 

NOTES:

- About if nobody wants you around; mad at you, want to be alone, ect.

- You're always on their side no matter what.

I don't know what I've done, to scare you away.

I want to say sorry but don't know what to say.

Tonight I laid down, trying to fall into slumber.

Used to be sunny, now all I hear is thunder. 

I sit by the window, watching time pass by in the sun going across the sky.

I know it's nothing, but I still wish I just knew why.

And the rain falls down, the storm moves in.

Why are you slamming doors and not letting me in.

I know you want me gone, only for right now

How did we drift apart so sudden, tell me how. 

I see the lightning in your eyes, and feel you push me away.

This is a pointless argument, yet I'm still on your side.

I know things will be fine, this is part of the rainy drive. 

You never could let me down, 

not even if you tried.

Easy to say you're a golden soul, and never lied.

My unofficial sister, motherly best friend.

Times are hard now, grief is out and in.

And the rain falls down, the storm moves in.

Why are you slamming doors and not letting me in.

I know you want me gone, only for right now

How did we drift apart so sudden, tell me how. 

I see the lightning in your eyes, and feel you push me away.

This is a pointless argument, yet I'm still on your side.

I know things will be fine, this is part of the rainy drive. 

Now you see, what I feel...

Remembering how I would open up my heart to you (When I needed to)

Not completely broken, but slightly cracked.

This friendship needs to be repaired, this time we'll show the love we lacked.

And the sun comes out, the clouds are gone.

I open the doors and letting myself in.

I still know you want me gone, but I see in your eyes...

We're not completely drifted to opposite sides.

The sky is blue again, we're almost back to where we began.

I never left your side, still standing by you.

We made it through the Rainy Drive as two.

Jonas Brothers 8/4/9 - Best Night Of My Life!

I know I'm not the only one, but do you guys have any idea what it's like to look into the eyes of the person you care the most deeply about? Well I do now I just experienced that last night. It was my second JB concert and it was by far the most amazing night ever. This is long, but if you read it all, I hope you like it! 

Let me start off when we left the house to go to Arco. We left about 12:30 and got there at like 1:30 I drove can't you tell? :) We thought we couldn't park anywhere so I drove around with my mom and we found the bus COVERED in Grafitti and messages. The best one was "Make my babies Nick" according to my mom, it made her laugh like a nut. I actually bought something to sign it with, Sharpies! ...baaaad decision because I couldn't even see what I wrote! But here's me signing the bus:

yes I was very excited :] Then I hung around with 2 girls Courtney and Sofie that I met there. They were really sweet girls and I lost track of them like 3 hours later! :[ So after the bus signing, my mom needed lunch so we went across the street to get some lunch, I haven't eaten all day but I wasn't hungry because I was too excited and full of butterflies. After lunch we went back to the same spot and my mom rested in the shade [keep in mind she was texting the entire concert.] and I found 2 of my friends I went to school with. One of them saw me and screamed at the top of her lungs "JORDAN!!!" And everyone was freaking out and said "SPARKS!? WHERE?!" and looked around it was pretty hilarious! While we met up they tried thinking of what to sign on the bus.  

A few minutes later after they met Sofie and Courtney, my mom went to go sit in the car and relax until the concert line up started. So we bought a few things at the stand outside. I got a black tour shirt, Nicks LVTT shirt, and a tour book. I praise God for my paycheck because that was $95 all together. After we bought some stuff we got some Burger King Crowns from this really awesome guy with JB's 'bodyguard' the Burger KING. haha :] We all sat down and signed them. Then later the same guy wanted us to all compete in a screaming contest, so yep 2 of us did. Me and Sofie against 5 other girls, there was a tie breaker between this cute little girl who looked like she was wearing a Hannah Montana wig but it was her real hair, and this teenage girl. They both ended up winning 2 BK gift cards with Joe and Nick on them I think... not sure. But it was like standing behind a Jet.  

After this we stood and talked and some girl who worked with the staff came up to us and said "Hey! We're having a karaoke contest by Jordins bus, we're keeping it on the DL right now but there is an amazing prize." So we went down, you know me, I love to sing. It's my life, so the guy had me pick from one of her big hits and I chose "No Air" even though I don't know Chris' part AT ALL. So I started singing and the guy asked if I at least knew the chorus. I knew that and Jordins part spot ON. As I kept singing a crowd literally built up. There were fans, and even some security guards, and some people with video cameras. I kind of looked like Jordins style in the "Superstitious" video with my dress style. As I kept singing I would point to my 2 friends and act dramatic with the song and dance in the parts I forgot. I saw everyone whispering to each other as they watched me and I turned around and in the waiting line I saw Denise and Maci!!! Two members on here and they waved and were excited :] such nice girls! After I was done the guy said "...Yeah you're pretty much amazing. You get to meet Jordin Sparks" I stood there like this :mellow: I could NOT believe I won a meet and greet because of my singing. He asked my name and I reply: "Jordan!" and he kind of flinched and went "Wow okay there you go!" and he gave me 3 wrist bands and a pass I had to present. I turned around and I got these questions: 

"You Look like Jordin!!" 

"Are you related to her?!"

"Are you at least Demi Lovatos cousin?!"  

All nope. I'm not related to any singer :]  

My friends were dancing and screaming thank you's. When I calmed down, I ran to meet Denise and Maci and they said I was really good and they were such sweet girls. :] They sat next to me last summer and I didn't know them then but I'm happy I do now! I ran to my moms car and showed her the passes and told her. She flipped out and started screaming excitement! I was dancing and my friends kept jumping up and down. I was so happy I got to have them meet Jordin on their first JB concert! I was so so happy for them!  

This is the video of me after I won:

 

Once that ended we ran to get in the long line. Later, My mom joined us. We stayed in the same spot for like 2 hours. No water, it must have been at least 90 degrees outside. I sat on the curb with Jessica and Stephanie [my friends] and we talked to some other girls in line about the time. We kept complaining about the heat. We made some friends, it was fun! While we waited, Honor Societys golf cart drove by and they waved to us and smiled. Such sweet boys! Then the line started moving and everyone cheered!  

Once we were inside we went to look for our seats, we entered the arena and I was in awe. The stage was beautiful. It was seriously AMAZING how big it was and how close we were!  

So we waited and I was like Jumping in my seat I was too excited. Then suddenly there was like a roll what sounded like thunder... then the lights went out. And the DJ is what I'm calling him came out to get us fired up and excited. Then moments later came Honor Society!!! They were fantastic and I loved their songs, I didn't get to buy their album, but when it comes out I am so getting it.  

Then came the Wonder Girls! OMG they were so cute and adorable with their voices and how they taught us the dance.



Then came Jordin!! I took a video of her:


when she first came out it was hard to find where the heck she was! :) She is an amazing performer and I always looked up to her since she won American Idol.



AMAZING! After she was done, we rushed to the meet and greet line. But before we left the DJ said "Now I hear there is a future Mrs. Nick Jonas in the house?" and I turned around and was like "WHAT!!!" My mom said "HURRY! You're going to be late!" Because we had to meet Jessica and Stephanie. He ran to one side of the catwalk, then to our side and he yelled "I know she's over here! She's in a dress I know it!" I wanted to go back sooooo bad. and I was in a dress! Then we left for the meet and greet line and I heard him say "aww... I guess she's gone" I seriously freaked for a minute.

Once we met up with the Jordin crew, we went down behind a curtain in the arena all together. And we waited for like 10 minutes and started to freak out because "Paranoid" was playing and everyone was screaming. JB CAME ON AND WE WERE STILL WAITING FOR JORDIN!" So suddenly the line moved faster and faster and it was our turn! We walked behind the curtain and there was Jordin. She is a beautiful person and she is SO sweet. It was going by so fast so we didn't get to talk, so I got to say was "Jordin you are amazing!" and she thanked me :]



Then she signed my envelope were the meet and greet pass was in and she said "GO! GO! Go see the boys!" In a sweet way and we RAN. My mom had to use the bathroom [-___-""] so I gave her my ticket so she could get back in and I RAN to the wrong side. I didn't realize this until 15 minutes later! I thought 2 girls stole my seat, and I was on the wrong floor. I got scared because I was lost. and I was in the isle asking some people to excuse me so I could look around where I was, and they would give me dirty looks when I passed them...

THIS GETS DRAMATIC: Then my mom sent me these text messages with A LOT of swearing in them... I'd post them but they're too profane and kind of abusive verbally. I started to cry more and more because she was like "I swear if you do not try to look for me I will beat the living sh!t out of you." yes... my mom says these things to me. Because of her I couldn't enjoy my concert. So I ran around looking. and I tripped over a bunch of wires. I sat there and cried because she kept sending me hateful texts by the second. Once I got myself together, I stood up with a wet face and make up streaming down, and this was during "Fly With Me" and Joe looked at me and I swear I saw him mouth 'are you okay?' and I nodded and smiled and he gave me a thumbs up and smiled. Then what happened? I got 5 texts from my mom with "F*** ANSWER ME YOU BRAT"... :( Then I ran again looking. Now it was Nick performing his speech and "Black Keys" I feel so terrible because during his speech I was running around and the lights were up so he could see us... I bet if he saw me he thinks I'm a disrespectful girl. I felt so bad not even listening to him... and it was my moms fault. She ruined it all by yelling at me. I was running around still and then "Much Better" started and Nick walked down my side of the catwalk A LOT in the beginning of the concert. The same way he was walking was the same way I was following a security guard [yes I finally asked someone to guide me] and he looked at me like he was checking me out - he bit his lip - or 'what the heck is she doing?' then I found my mom and she yelled "SIT DOWN!" to me. And she grabbed my arm hard and yelled in my face, I shouldn't post it. But I have a sore arm. I praise God I was 2 seats away from her. 3 girls around me gave me hugs after they heard what happened. The girls sitting behind us looked like they wanted to yell at my mom for that, They gave her the nastiest looks ever. I mean I was CRYING my eyes out in the middle of "Tonight".

But things got better after that. Once "Year 3000" and "Gotta Find You" Played, I felt so much better. =] We were on the foam side, so no Lovebug view for us.

Here's some videos:

Play My Music


Lovebug:



Turn Right:


Excuse my tone deaf singing if you hear me... haha :]

Then my favorite part of the night... Definitely was "When You Look Me In Eyes". I have never seen them look so happy in my life. Kevin was all smiles, Joe was nothing but laughter, and Nick gave the most adorable teeth smile ever in my video I took. I am so happy I caught it on tape:


During WYLMITE Nick, did nothing but look at me once he saw me. I know this all may sound over exaggerated but I promise you, Team Jonas, I am not lying. Would I lie? I promise. Joe looked at me for a second around 0:47, but when Nick first smiled [You can see it in the video], After Joe passed him he raised his eyebrows at me as if he was checking me out: 0:57-1:00 here's a picture of Joe:

and here's Nick:



Then once the Piano turned, he looked at me again. :)









and here's Kevin, but I forgot which song it was:
I had SO much fun with their cover of "Sweet Caroline" I didn't get it on video but here are the others:

WWIII:


Joe and Kevin Stalling:


and the rest you can find on my youtube :] youtube.com/JordyElizabeth

Here's who else I got:

Christa and Garbo!


She looks like she's yelling at him. haha =]

and here's JT looking at me:

THANKS JOE AND KEVIN

and here's a girl who sat Next to me! She was SO sweet!


She went by Doodle :) you can see the rest of the photos here: http://s303.photobucket.com/albums/nn133/Lemonade_Ice/concerts/Jonas%20Brothers/?start=all

The whole Night was amazing:
- Joe Jonas asked if I was okay and gave me a thumbs up
- Nick Jonas checked me out and didn't stop looking at me and he was so happy!
- Kevin was all smiles! and he was so energetic!
- Everything was EPIC.

Oh I forgot! The ending. When they bow and run to the walks. When they ran to ours they held hands and everything. Nick was on my side and he bowed down, and he reached for all of us, and when I know he was looking at me, he smiled with no teeth and reached for my hand. Even though all these girls were trying to like pile on him, he just reached for me but I was 3 seats away and couldn't reach. He had the most beautiful brown eyes ever. I put my foot on the chair so I could reach, it looked like if he touched my hand I would jump on stage. He seriously wanted to touch my hand. I could feel it, But the security said "Stay in your seat, Miss!" and I backed away when I was one inch away from Nick, and I shook my head and mouthed 'sorry! :(" and he gave me a puppy dog face and my heart broke. and he ran back to the other catwalk with Joe and Kevin. If you don't believe this, you don't have to. But believe me it happened. When he gave me that puppy face, my heart just broke to pieces. But it was the best moment of my life even if it was 6 seconds long. =]

Then it was a long drive up home.

That was the best night of my life! All the pictures and videos are available to see!! I feel so blessed to have had that happen. And I pray you get to experience something like that too if you have yet to go to a world tour concert, it is the best feeling ever and all of you Jonas fans are beautiful and will stand out to them!

- Jordy <3

Butterflies, Beautiful Day, And A Delicious Recipe

Why Good Morning! Did you have a great nights sleep?... That's fabulous. :) Me? Why I only got 4 minutes! 

Yes Sadly... I Technically slept on and off for 7 hours. I can't help myself!! I'm too excited to see my boys tonight!! I haven't seen them in over a year! And the worst thing? I have butterflies building their nests in my stomach... I'm hungry in my body, but my head is saying: 'Think about food? I will control your stomach to regurgitate' Yes I feel awful this morning from that. Stupid Head. Stupid Butterflies... Never thought I say this, but stupid Jonas Brothers for being so gosh darn Charming! <3

And yes, It is a beautiful morning! The sky is as clear as the ocean and the sun is bright as stagelights which will blind me tonight. It's summer days like these I never want to end. 

I'm currently waiting for my mother to wake up. Poor thing had to work until 3:30 am last night, I'm praying she can stay awake! I'm watching Mamma Mia whilst I wait, wishing I could sing along without waking her up, but that's false. Boo! 

What is this new delicious recipe? 

JONAS CUPCAKES!

They don't look like that, they are quite adorable! Click on the picture to go to the webpage! And the frosting isn't as thick as these look. :) Each with their own style and recipe.

Nick Cupcake: Sugarfree, Red Velvet cupcake with low carb frosting - So Diabetic Nick can have a nice treat without worrying too much about his blood sugar <3

Kevin Cupcake: A very adorable dark chocolate tuxedo, It has whipped cream and a cute little tie and top hat to show he's a future groom :) 

Joe Cupcake: Dark, intense, Chocolate. With Chocolate frosting. You can add two things to it: Hard Rock, Glass Candy pieces. Edible, and you put them on top like a topping... or sticking out, showing the real Joseph is clumsy. Haha :) And to make an after Joe cupcake, Do the same except the glass candy and put kissy lips sprinkles. Smother his booboos with kisses :D

Extra - Danielle Cupcake: Kevins beautiful bride-to-be, Danielle. Vanilla cupcake with blue frosting and yellow and white sprinkles. If you can, find a veil to top it off.

=] I need to wait for my mother now, and off to Sacramento to see the Jonas Boys, with Jordin Sparks, and Honor Society! 

I'll write it all when I get home!

- Jordy

What Tomorrow Holds.

Grr... Summer's almost over :( I'm sad. Though, I will admit it. I miss school. I miss my friends, and I do miss being in Choir and Drama. But I love the hot weather and sleeping in... And after this school year, I have Junior College. But it's not the end of my childhood. I will never grow up in my heart, I'm Peter Pan. That's why they call me Wendy sometimes. 

For now, while it's still summer, here's what I have left to do before school:

Jonas Brothers Concert - TOMORROW! YAY!

License Test - August 13th

Sunsplash - No idea when that will be though. 

I'm sure I have more, but I can't remember at the moment. 

As of now, I want to talk to Emilia about New York. We both need to buy houses or Apartments there and be roomies on our mission to be Triple Threats [she's most likely going to be, I'm a beginning dancer.] But she's not on, Neither is Megan. So I'm watching JONAS and trying to pick between 2 dresses for the concert tomorrow.

Here are our choices:

So I ADORE the color on this one and how it goes against my skin. It's comfy and light, but a little snug in the hips because my hips are pretty big. But I bought this special for the concert.

Then I found this while shopping over the weekend... 

And now I can't make up my mind. :( They're both so lovely and summery, and they stand out. My mom wants the boys to see me (heck so do I!) but I cannot decide and it's making me insane. 

I'm leaning towards number 2 though. 

As for tomorrow, There is a verizon booth where they'll hold a contests with your verizon phone to with soundcheck passes. I'm praying I'll get lucky, but who knows what can happen. I hope I do get lucky and win soundcheck. But God knows what the future holds.

- Jordy 

I'm Lousy At This.

I really am! When I say I'll 'update every day' I end up doing that 2 weeks later! I am such a bum! SHH! Hang on... I'm trying to remanence on what has been happening since I last updated...

OKAY! I think I got something. So it is now July [Obviously. Geez Jordan!] And the 4th has passed, it wasn't really eventful to me. My mom dragged me to the lake in our community and I didn't see anyone I knew. Then we went to 2 of her friends house where I sat there with my mac and a DVD.... yep I just watched a movie. Then when she and my step-dad were done with their stuff, I went up the street to watch the fireworks. It was pretty nice from our view :) There were like 20 other people watching it and someone played very nice patriotic music! I didn't get bit by a mosquito! I'm so happy! :D

I believe the next thing that happened was Tubing and Wakeboarding with my church. SO much fun! I wanted to wakeboard, but we didn't have enough time :( but tubing was EPIC. Capital E! I met some really nice girls who were going to be freshmen. They were so adorable and sweet! My left cheek still hurts from the surgery, and I hit it a few times but I managed while holding on for dear life. This one girl would hop from one tube to the other... crazy chick! I took billions of pictures. My best friend India was sunburnt pretty bad, poor dear. Her boyfriend Kevin was just laughing and we gave ourselves nicknames. Kevin and I tan, and India burns. She's apparently Strawberry and cream ice cream, I'm caramel mocha, and Kevin is Chocolate. Haha! Such a fun day!

Those were probably the most eventful things that have happened to me since the last update... Now I'm in the bay area at my grandparents. My dad is supposed to pick me up tomorrow and we were supposed to go to Marine World with FAMILY. Now it's just me and him... ugh :( Today was not a good day. I haven't written a song in ages and I have no inspiration. And I have been so moody. I pray tomorrow is a better day. 

- Jordie.

Lazy Days, Fun Days.

I'm pretty sure we all know that I was the sleepy one here. I posted this a day later due to being "so tired" but to sum it up, it was eventful. 

It started with Church as my usual Sunday. I love church too much to miss it even for recovering from surgery. I was told I'm doing well compared to most people for the third day... still swollen like a chipmunk though! So we went through our service, it's always amazing to walk in and see everyone every sunday! Wendy, one of our leaders, actually said I'm holding up better than her son did on the third day. I'm shocked because the third day was the worst and I did alot yesterday.

After Church, India, Kevin, Tyler and I went to Lunch. Japanese Buffet FTW!!! I had noodles... Kevin was nice and gave me some of his salmon, but I forgot to tell him once I swallowed it that I hate fish. India and Tyler are special Ed according to how they eat crab. It was hilarious watching them try to get it out of the hard shell! And Tyler made a funny: 

Tyler: Taco Porn? 

Kevin: O_O. 

Then there was a moment when Kevin dropped what I think was his straw rapper in his drink and he screamed. It was an entertaining Lunch. We would have been reported, it's a good thing the place was empty!

After lunch we went to Kevins. He's got a nice place... tis cozy. India and I fell asleep for a few minutes on their couches while Tyler was committing suicide on Call of Duty 4 and Kevin had 10 minutes of World of Warcraft. Then Kevin played random videos on his computer - Amazing Sound System! - Quote: I wish I was reincarnated as your feet so I will never have to see you again. That guy was a comic genius!! The script was so messed up though! Renee came home with Kevins brother Sam later too and we all talked and had a good time, Kevin made Tyler eat a hot pepper. I could have had one, but my mouth still in this condition would NOT survive. 

We ended up looking for movies to go see, guess what it was? Nothing other than Transformers: Rise of the Fallen. INTENSE. I don't have bragging rights because I fell asleep for only 5 minutes! 5 MINUTES and I get made fun of for it. India was totally reacting, so did I at a few points. We awwed, we cried, we laughed until we almost fell into the theatre seats. It was an amazing movie! I recommend it. :) So much action and violence... explosives every 5 seconds! 

After the movies we were going to go back to my place to swim at the lake, but we'd have to get India's swimsuit, Tylers, and Kevins, So what else other than Gas money got in the way. We went to the funpark for a few minutes and I used like 8 dollars on the plush machine trying to win Kevin a Kakashi doll... fail. I FAIL. India was blaming Kevin for doing that do me, but no. I use up one dollar on those machines it turns into 100 dollars. I didn't win anything :( After this we went to Indias to plan where to go, but her Mom gave her a curfew for studying so we ended up swimming at her Aunts house, very nice people! And we had fun even though I almost stepped on Red ants walking there... and on the way back? mosquitos.

Tyler almost couldn't drive me and Kevin home, he was so tired but he managed. Kevin and I offered to drive in case he crashed, but we were kidding. He just barely made it out of my gated community in one piece. The rest of the ride... it was different - Tyler. 

Haha :) I wish every day of my summer was like that with them! Thank you so much, you 3. 

I want you to hold the key to my heart.

I seriously love this kid.

Nicholas Jerry Jonas. I don't know him personally, but I think I'm truly in love with him. Only God knows the person who you're destined to be with is right? I've been thinking alot lately... about my ex. I've only had one love in my life and it gave me a preview of what love looks like, and how beautiful it is... though what I had with him wasn't that kind of love. I mean, we love each other, just not like that. 

We were together for a little over a week, and it was his decision and I blamed everything on myself for it. I was in a depression for 5 months. I missed him like crazy and I had the worst pain every going through my heart. He's a beautiful boy, inside and out and he only deserves the best. But then just before summer hit, I got over him and it felt great. And I expressed it through my favorite hobby, Acting. 

But anyway, I have been thinking. About Love, and Relationships, and "The One"... Everybody has a someone out there. And it's usually someone you least expect it to be. You can be a small town girl with no way out and you can marry a big time celebrity. Something tells me that Nick Jonas could be the one for me... I see something in him that I've never seen in a celebrity crush before. People tell me I'm crazy, but only 3 people have faith in me. That's 2 of my great friends Megan and Courtney, They both have told my multiple times they believe me and Nick are meant to be and they both have had dreams about me and him. And the third person? My own mother. She loves the Jonas Brothers and when I became a huge fan of them years ago, she's always loved Nick. 

I feel like God has something planned in that light.

But so you know... to sum this up. Love... Love isn't something that happens overnight, Love can come from anywhere. It could be right under your nose, It could be your best friend, or it could be the nerdy kid down the street. You never know who you'll fall the hardest for.

Like Nick. He's caught me whenever I fell, and he doesn't even know I'm alive. The Jonas Brothers and their songs are the soundtrack to my life. It's like they were hired to write songs if my life was a movie. =) I love Joe and Kevin just the same as I do Nick, but my love for Nick? It stands out... It's strong and unbreakable. I think Nick Jonas could really be the one for me... Those Niley fans will be crying their eyes out that Day. :)

- Jordan

The After-Pain

A Sore Mouth, Swollen Chipmunk Cheeks, and the pain to top it off. So as I said, Today was the big day for my wisdom teeth extraction, and all I can say is that it went by SO fast. I was still terrified though, the minute I sat in the chair and the assistant put the pulse thing on my finger and the patches on my chest, I flipped a little. I cried a little bit at the fact I was really undergoing surgery, but it's really nothing to be afraid of. The only thing that hurts is the pain afterwards.

So I sat down in the chair, and she took my pulse and put the thing on my finger [sorry, I don't know what it's called!] and 2 patches on my chest and one on my hip. So the assistant talked to me about what I'm doing this summer, I told her I would be with some friends, and work on selected days, and Disneyland and such. She was really funny and sweet, and she held my hand because I got a little scared. 

In the middle of us talking about how my friend, Krista, got hers out and she counted backwards, Doc came in. Haha He asked if I wanted to do that, but I didn't need to and I'll get to that in a moment. This isn't very descriptive because I barely remember anything that happened. What I remember is that they put the oxygen gas on my face and I couldn't see anything except the ceiling and the Doctors. I felt something cold on my arm and it felt pretty good since it was so hot outside and kind of in there.

Then he asked if I felt a pinch.

I replied "I don't feel anything I have no idea what is going on, Sir." He told me with a smile that the medicine was in and they were ready with me. This is literally how it went:

Me: "Okay... Because I am- *passes out*"

[[a blink later...]]

Doc: Make sure you eat alot of popsicles and ice cream.

Me:...We're done?

It was literally that quick! So no need to be afraid if you have yet to get yours done, the only painful part is going home high as a kite because I was tripping out, man.

Shows you I will never do drugs. Hand me Pot, LSD, ANYTHING and I will push you down a Mountain.

 

So now I'm home talking to my Sissa and relaxing the drugs off. I haven't eaten anything all day except a small plate of scrambled eggs, I can't chew! Then my mom gave me Vicodin... Oh my goodness I regret swallowing that pill. I've felt nauseated ever since. And I have what looks like a neck brace around my head, which you saw at the top of the blog. I look like a chipmunk without it though! 

A little tip if you have yet to get yours pulled: Once you go home and take a nap, EAT SOMETHING. Do not put up with a stomachache!

And just relax until you feel better. It's been less than 24 hours and I feel better than I did when I came home :D

- Jordy

Welcome To The Family

So I have finally made a blogger. YAY! I've grown fond of it so far... My best friend had one, so I got inspired to make my own :) Speak of the Devil, I'm playing Final Fantasy X with her right now over Skype [She lives in Newfoundland] GOD I missed that girl! I'm going to make this short since we're playing right now. We've planned a HSM 3 Role Play on our Gaia Accounts and We have so much to catch up on... I hope I see her more this summer, but we have Work, Occasional Rehearsals, and Vacations? I don't know but I hope I still see her! 

Hm, What else. Tomorrow I get my Wisdom Teeth out... It's a tad frightening since I've never gone under "Surgery" before. And I hate needles. But everybody says it will go by fast! I pray it will. Please God... <3

Well I better follow her blog, and then get back to playing FFX :) 

God Bless You!

Jordie